Updated: Oct 17
▶ Why do we often find ourselves passing judgment on others?
It's fascinating to observe that the people who are most critical of others are often their own harshest critics. In many cases, we engage in judgment as a means to boost our own self-esteem, compensating for a lack of self-acceptance and self-love.
Imagine for a moment if we could wholeheartedly embrace ourselves, flaws and all. Would we still feel the need to be so critical of those around us?
Chances are, we wouldn't. We wouldn't seek reasons to tear someone down just to elevate ourselves.
In a world filled with diverse perspectives and unique journeys, it's crucial to remember that we're all a work in progress.
🚩 JUDGMENTAL THOUGHTS
Becoming aware of the judgmental thoughts and behaviors caused by low self-esteem is an important step on the path to personal growth and better relationships.
Here are five steps to help you become more aware of these tendencies:
Start by setting aside time for self-reflection on a regular basis. This can be done through journal writing, meditation, or simply quiet moments of reflection. Ask yourself questions like:
"Am I being judgmental right now?" or
"Why do I feel the need to criticize this person?".
Journaling can be particularly effective in uncovering patterns in your thoughts and emotions.
🔸 Mindfulness exercises:
Practicing mindfulness can help you become more aware of your thoughts, feelings, and behaviors as they occur. When you notice judgmental thoughts creeping in, take note of them without judging them. Observe these thoughts as passing clouds in the sky of your mind. Mindfulness meditation can help you develop this skill.
🔸 Seek feedback:
Trusted friends and family members can provide valuable feedback on your behavior. Ask them if they have noticed you making judgmental comments or exhibiting critical behavior. Encourage them to be honest with you. Sometimes, others can see patterns we might not recognize in ourselves.
🔸 Identify triggers:
Pay attention to situations or people that trigger your judgmental tendencies. Recognize the patterns and circumstances that lead to these feelings of insecurity or low self-esteem. Identifying triggers can help you anticipate and manage judgmental thoughts before they arise.
🔸 Challenge negative self-talk:
Low self-esteem often leads to negative self-talk, which can contribute to judgmental behavior toward others. When you catch yourself engaging in self-criticism, challenge those thoughts. Ask yourself if they are based on evidence, and if not, reframe them in a more positive and realistic light. Building self-compassion is essential in countering low self-esteem.
Self-awareness is an ongoing process, and it may take some time to recognize and change these patterns. Be patient with yourself and celebrate small successes along the way. As you become more aware of your judgments that stem from low self-esteem, you can work to build healthier self-esteem and cultivate more compassionate relationships with others.
Let's strive to replace judgment with empathy and self-acceptance. By doing so, we not only become kinder to others but also nurture a healthier relationship with ourselves.
The path to personal growth begins with self-love and acceptance. As we learn to embrace our true selves, we create a more compassionate and understanding world for everyone.