Do You Really Mean What You Say?

stephaniekollmann
Jun 2
2 min read

Has flakiness become the new norm in our fast-paced world?

We live in a time of instant messages, fleeting attention, and quick dopamine hits. One day it’s “I love you,” the next it’s “I’m not sure anymore.” Commitments dissolve overnight. Sweet words evaporate with the morning light. And it’s not always from a place of malice -it’s often just... thoughtless.

But here’s the thing: words matter. Promises carry weight, even if they’re casually spoken. And while we all have the right to change our minds (and we should, if something no longer aligns with our truth), there’s a huge difference between changing your mind and speaking without ever truly checking in with yourself in the first place.

Before you make a promise or declare something big—whether it’s “I’ll be there,” “I care,” or “I love you”—pause. Feel into it. Ask yourself: Is this real for me? Do I mean this, or am I saying it because it feels good in the moment?

Because the truth is, words without integrity hurt. Empty promises break trust. Thoughtless affirmations confuse and disappoint. And when people feel unseen, discarded, or misled, they carry those wounds into future relationships. Hurt people hurt people. And so the cycle continues.

We’re living in a society that often avoids accountability, where people-pleasing and performative kindness replace real depth. But it doesn’t have to be that way. We can slow down. We can be mindful. We can choose to speak only when our words are grounded in sincerity.

It’s about presence.

It’s about becoming more aware of the impact we have on others.

It’s about choosing integrity over impulsiveness, and authenticity over approval-seeking.

Especially when it comes to affection, promises, or commitments - ask yourself honestly:

Do I really mean what I’m about to say?

Because your words matter.

They ripple out. And they can either build trust, or quietly erode it.